tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
