I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
