end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
