Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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