Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize