sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
True college students do jello shots in the library
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Randomize
