Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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