Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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