just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
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