I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
