I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
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