Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
so let's talk penis.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
May the power of my ass compel you!!
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Randomize
