only if we run a train.
done.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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