you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
