I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Randomize
