he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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