It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
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