So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
