i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize
