4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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