I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Randomize
