May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
