I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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