Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
When did angry sex become our thing?
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize
