hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
