it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
