I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
