so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
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