You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Randomize
