so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Randomize
