Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
