Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
