you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Randomize
