the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Randomize
