I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize