Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
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