This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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