I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Randomize
