Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Randomize
