I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
