gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
