Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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