make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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