i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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