dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
