There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
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