Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Randomize
