I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
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