..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
I'm always down for nudity.
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