you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
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