You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
At least make sure they are 18
Why
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Randomize
